Mindful Materialist T-Shirts

"I misplace everything, yet there always seems to be more of it."

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

"I shop, therefore I am."

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

I want a calendar where every day says here and now

Go ahead and dissect me

Derren Brown: Pushed to the Edge

2 + 2 = 4. 2 x 2 = 4. Oh, I get it! It's a Zen thing!

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

The power of the brain

"Don’t think of that tennis ball as lost. Think of it as finally free."

'I don't know why Doc, but my life is really upside down...'

"You are responsible for editing your thoughts. I'm just here to audit them."

Binary Meditation.

'You are being haunted by the spirit of a slimmer, trimmer, you.'

'If only I could accept that I can't accept being someone who finds it hard to accept acceptance from those who accept me for the person that I can't accept I really am.'

'Your problems are caused by all-or- nothing thinking. It's either that, or you don't have any problems.'

'I always answer their questions with a question - it drives them nuts!'

"I worry that some people find me boring"

"The alarm will alert us when our meditative, present-moment-restoring tech break has ended."

"People can bridge the great distance between the Earth and the Moon..."

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with worrying that you forget something."

Internal Prisons

"I'm doing better. The voices in my head can now access my email."

"The unexamined life is not worth living." Socrates. For dogs maybe, but not for cats.

"Hmmm?!"

'I don't know how you stand listening to people's problems all of the time, Doctor Barnes.'

'You're insecure because your data is unsecured.'

'Too expensive, too long, sounds boring, the jacket is lousy...'

Jim was busy detoxing his negative thinking patterns.

My mind is like a steel trap, it's just a bit rusty.

'Stephen Hawking'