Materialist Thinker T-Shirts

"I shop, therefore I am."

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

"I'll take new members any way I can get them."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

"Things moving too fast. We need to get back to our roots. And grubs."

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

"If you haven't got a TV, what do you point your furniture at?"

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

We just assumed everyone knew they couldn't take it with them.

Robert Macaire recieving expensive gifts from his love

"Well, maybe money can't buy happiness, but I'm willing to try."

New Gods

'Just because!'

"So you can take it with you!"

"I misplace everything, yet there always seems to be more of it."

"I always wanted to be nothing in the City."

"My third and final wish is for money and wealth—again!"

'Shallow, so you think I'm shallow do you? Just because I happen to think my career is important, that my car matters and that clothes make a difference.'

"Good morning, Mrs. Kiley."

"We can't come to an agreement about how to fix your car, Mr. Simons. Sometimes that's the way things happen in a democracy."

Consumerism junkie.

Other Patron Saints of Christmas

"Never mind."

"Depending on who you know, you CAN take it with you. See anything you like?"

"To eventually be rich enough to throw away brand new stuff."

"Ed's simplifying his world before the elections. Only one news station. Only one remote."

"For Gladys it's not the thought that counts, it's the size of the gift."

'Who told you about my lottery win?'