Materialism Commentator T-Shirts

"I'll take new members any way I can get them."

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"But will it distract the public's attention enough that they mindlessly buy our products?"

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

'That might work as your own personal mission statement. But what we're really shooting for here is something the whole company can get behind.'

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

'A market ruled by only three companies is bad for the customers and it puts down development and innovation. I would be a strong opponent to such a market, if I didn't own all three companies.'

"Today the market closed at exactly the right price, and all buyers and sellers were very happy."

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

We're changing from 'tried and true' to 'fly by the seat of our pants'. So, I'm afraid you're out, Tom !

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

Poor man and rich man

Free Speech has heavy price.

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

The Birth of Free Market Economics. I wish I had a rock. I wish I had a stick. (Published originally on August 8, 2005.)

F.W. Woolworth and Karl Marx Go Into Retailing

'Remember, it's not a lie if it makes us money.'

The Good Boys - Bill Gates and Warren Buffett

We just assumed everyone knew they couldn't take it with them.

'Don't say I didn't warn you. The rising tide of consumer indifference is finally catching up with us.'

Economists generally agree that consumers don't trust products that cost too little. If an item is too inexpensive, it seems cheap. A higher cost connotes quality. Price hike! Beware the rabid capitalist bearing economic theory.

Robert Macaire recieving expensive gifts from his love

"About our shareholders of course."

"Personally I don't think our salaries are too high - I see them as legitimate compensation for the emotional trauma we suffer due to the public's disdain for our high salaries."

Rudy, we're going to have to cut expenses. We already did that, boss. I don't think you're clear on the concept, minion. It's a way of life. Did you read one book and then never read again? Did you listen to one song and then never listen to another again? Did you kiss someone once and then never again? Cutting expenses isn't something you do just once. A good businessman cuts expenses constantly. Whether he needs to or not. You trim the fat. When you run out of fat, you trim the nerves and the

"Eighty percent polyester."

"My third and final wish is for money and wealth—again!"

Statue of Liberty Burns Money As Flame