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"Enough about the pandemic, just tell me about your mother...."

"It was never about the presents - it's about the power."

"I think I'm making progress. My agonized ambivalence has given way to plain old agony."

Woman reads a mountain of books, all about OCD.

'I keep thinking about teaching.'

"Lets work on losing your inner child"

"I'm doing a lot better now that I'm back in denial."

"Relax. You're just de-ranged."

'When did you first notice you were becoming invisible?'

"I know it's tempting but please don't pigeonhole me."

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

'You're lucky. At least you know your troubles aren't psychosomatic.'

'Do you think I have an inferiority complex?' - 'No, I think you are inferior.'

'The first step was admitting I didn't really have a problem.'

"As far as I can tell, meditation is just worrying minus the content."

"I can't get close to people."

"Something has to change....my life is turning into pure hell."

'Sorry, Rorschach.'

Coping with apathy (title of book in trash)

'...and what makes you think that people always take advantage of you?'

'I'm going to take you off 8 medications and put you on 9 new ones.'

A warning for travellers in the fast lane: A beta block has shut off John's meta mind.

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

'I think paranoia is out to get me!'

'Schizophrenia! Schizophrenia! What the bloody hell makes you think I've got schizophrenia?'

'My guru thinks you're nuts.'

'You're being too hard on yourself. No one's perfect - aside from you.'

'I'm concerned. I'm happy!

"...I need some closure. Can we go ahead and spin the Wheel Of Blame?"

'Troubles and constant suffering almost made me give up on life.... BUT THEN I DISCOVERED MASOCHISM!!'

"How long have you been Acrophobic"

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

"Of course you're going to be depressed if you keep comparing yourself with successful people."

"Your psychosis is so original, that we're still brainstorming about a good name for it!"