Memo Miscommunicator Gifts

"No, I did NOT get the memo about "Casual Fridays." Had I known I would have worn flats."

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

"I thought you said I needed to get some 'extra size'."

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

"I meant the dog!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

Communication Breakdowns

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

'She's throwing a dinner party - Just for me...'

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"This is not what I meant when I said 'let's chill'."

"Excuse me, but it's GREG, Greg Chalmers."

"When you said you were taking me south on vacation I assumed you meant to the tropics."

"OK, you're right. It does say take 2 tablets by mouth."

When you said it was a place with women and a bar I didn't think you meant a ballet class.

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

'I'm afraid you've got the wrong department.'

"Aunt Mary, I think you may not have heard me right. I requested a bundt cake."

"No...I said aperitif!!"

Sea kelp? I said "seek help"!

'Sir, I'm an estate agent. Not a showbiz agent.'

"...But I don't want to get in the back Norma, I want to stay in the front with you"

Shoot...not literally, of course.

'Chapman, you misunderstood what I said about the Clark account. I said mull it over.'

"Just wanted to make sure you said no mayo that way I'll know to give you extra."

Dyslexic Doomsayers.

The Embarrassment of Van Gogh