Meeting Jokers Gifts

'First things first. Before we nail a solution, we have to pin a little blame.'

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

'Kimble, I'm going to give you a chance at purchasing - nip over to the cafe and get me a cheese and pickle sandwich.'

"Just how long has there been a maraschino cherry at the top of the organizational chart?"

"Well, it could be the rising tide of consumer indifference to our company's latest product, or it might be the sink in the men's bathroom acting up again. We're still not sure."

Photobooth Photobomb

'Bummer Dude! No waves. Moondoggie punked me!'

Is there a spin doctor in the house?

'I want a win-win situation where both wins are ours.'

"I want to apologise for calling this meeting on such short notice."

Giggle.

"When you hear me begin talking about our lousy sales figures, you guys create a distraction."

'For pity's sake stop that infernal humming!'

"So how long have you been working the business?"

When Managers have a Four Seasons pizza.

'When you are done balancing in your chair we will continue the meeting.'

"Jane is sales, Fred is accounting, and Johnny's song and dance."

'Any questions?'

"Damn it, Hopkins, didn't you get yesterday's memo?"

"I don't like these sales figures. Prepare them in another color and font and resubmit them."

'All those in favour of my new proposal say aye. Those against, also say aye.'

'Its simple: we're the nanotechnology department.'

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

"Very good Carter, but when you said you wanted to show us your Powerpoint we assumed you meant presentation!"

'I preferred my old title of Executive Vice-President.'

'My sales training was right. The person in the highest chair is dominant.'

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'So the guidance suggests that if anyone threatens you, throw it them.'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

"We're bears you fool, we don't need agendas!"

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

"We have a clear work/life policy. . . If you have a life, you get more work."