Meditation Coach Gifts

"Meditation is too hard. How do you keep one thought in your mind for this long?"

Unguided imagery

We'll now take a minute for silent meditation.

For Marcos, dissolving the ego was going to be a long-term process.

"Showoff"

"Your lives will continue to stink until you find your center."

"I accept the cookies I cannot change."

"Show off."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

'Did you try 'Google'?'

SCHOOL OF YOGA, YOU MUST LEVITATE THIS HIGH TO ENTER

Felix was finally relaxed. He was finally, really and truly in touch with himself. Then he suddenly remembered how his Catholic school nun said that was evil.

'I just found out that the mantra you gave me is Pig Latin!'

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

Breathe in. Breathe out

"I want you to find your centre."

Peace. Love. Light

Guru.

'The heck of it is, non-violence never solves anything either!'

'I'm on my break right now -- can you come back next February?'

Unguided imagery

Enlightened Cursing

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

"Are you sure this is the happiness guy?"

Trending wise.

"That's good. Now extend the fingers and lose the attitude."

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Where your mind & battle are los

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Counting ribs

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'