Medieval Mender T-Shirts

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"We'll always have couples therapy."

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

Couples' therapy

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

'I find that a live rhinoceros rather than an invisible elephant speeds things up considerably.'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"Like that?"

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

'Typical bloody man, you've no idea what loyalty means...it's just self, self...self!'

'I'm putting you on a diet: No more fat knights, maidens only...'

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

Yes, yes, let your aggressions out, but not here!

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

'We were so attracted to each other - now we're just poles apart'

"Can I call you back, I'm engaged in crisis talks."

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

"Well, how can I help cure your severe hypochondria if you keep cancelling appointments due to illness?"

"Whose turn is it to be happy?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'