Medication Mix-up Detective Pillows

'You're acting strangely Albert. You've just taken your angina capsule before your cholesterol and anti-inflammatory pills!'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

If these are your medications, what happened to the beads I bought?

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

"I was able to consolidate all your prescriptions into a single pill."

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

Science and Coronavirus

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

'You're right...these are your hormone pills. Thank goodness we noticed before anything serious happened.'

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

Too bad Desmond had never learned to recognize the early warning signs of a heart attack.

'This could end up costing a lot more than I thought -- your disease is psychocomatic!'

'There's something wrong here. You have all these risk factors, and yet you're in excellent health.'

'KEEPING UP in practice simply means knowing which drug the FDA has withdrawn.'

'You came through the delivery with flying colors, Mrs. Lewis.'

Pharmacy. Prescription. Don't worry about that --- After paying for those you can't afford to drive! (Published originally on August 1, 2011.)

'We thank you for giving us the ability to genetically alter, irradiate and microwave this wonderful food.'

La Tour 2007.

'Will this make me feel as happy as the people in the commercial?'

Gene doping in sport.

Man has drug cabinet labelled 'Safe Drugs' and 'Not Sure Drugs'.

'He broke his wrist trying to open his medicine.'

"From the gentleman at the end of the bar."

"Mr. Bermudez passed out and hit his head, but that'll heal."

'He likes to point out the obvious.'

Hypochondriac at two computers. One reads 'Internet diagnosis', other says 'Second opinion'.

'Wow! Well this certainly rules out hypochondria!'

'I wonder if anyone will miss me after I'm gone?' 'Would you like to pay your bar tab now?'

'But surely if I'm convinced I'm a hypochondriac that makes me one?'

Most common side effects...

Health food disguised as junk foodjunk food disguised as health food.

"Gina remembers where she left her pen... No wonder I can't write with this. It's a rectal thermometer."

"I just thought I'd run the symptoms by you before I get a proper diagnosis on Google."

It turns out celiac disease is thousands of years old. Yet I still never heard about "gluten" till recently. What do you think that means, Randy? It obviously means big wheat has some explaining to do. They must've altered the grains. I don't know. Maybe it's because our environment has gotten cleaner. So since our antibodies haven't had to work as hard, they've gotten weaker. HOJ. If there's one thing you'd know about, little buddy, it's atrophy. We should have our own science show.

"I told him 1 tranquilizer every 4 hours, not 4 tranquilizers every 1 hour."