Medical Jokesters Pillows

'Okay, how did you do that?'

Subway Lawyer meets Subway Doctor

'Deep thought may be some time.'

'What exactly is this darling, in case I have to describe to later to a doctor?'

Doctor testing patient's reflexes causes the patients' false teeth to fly out.

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

Virtual Doctor

"I'm putting you on a beef diet. Nothing beef for breakfast, nothing beef for lunch, nothing beef for tea, nothing beef for..."

"So, let's catch a wellness wave!"

"Right here is your baby’s infrastructure, and in a month or so we’ll be able to see the analytics."

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

'Take two and call me from the Emergency room.'

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

"When you're ready, I'm going to stand on my hind legs, and lick it better."

'Could you stay out of the room for awhile, Nurse? -- Every time you walk in here, his testosterone levels surge.'

Hypochondria Hospital

'Don't worry about your heart - it will last you till the end of your days. . .!'

'Where does it hurt?'

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

'Brain surgery, Harold? Have you lost your mind?!'

NHS Efficiency Drive

"Uh, try unplugging him, then plugging him back in."

Heart Rate, Respiration, Insurance Remaining.

"I only came in to get my eyes done."

'You need a heart transplant, maybe two.'

'Two scalpels and a nurses hat are missing...'

"Next time you give CPR try not to use your tongue."

'Maybe we shouldn't have used the tail as the donor site for a skin graft.'

'So did you want the ectomy, or just the otomy?'

Why dogs are not hired to do bone scans

I like a lot of witnesses around.

Patients with HMO dread anesthesia.

'You'd better stick with blurry eyes, anxiety attacks and hallucinations, because he drug prescription, I'd give,shows even greater side effects!'

Be careful how you unwrap it I think it MIGHT be his stool sample!