Meat Lovers Gifts

'I'm not sure how to break this to you all... the Atkins diet is back.'

Eat Meat For the Environment!

Santa Enjoys Venison.

"If you gatherers want anything other than tofu burgers, go and hunt it yourself!"

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"I bet if it hadn't smoked, it'd still be alive."

"But Herman, we can't just throw in the towel like that."

'Mammoth is murder!'

Where mystery meat comes from.

'It's a new, high-protein substitute for soybean paste. It's made of steak.'

'Not mad cow disease again! I'm cancelling tonight's steak dinner.'

Prisoner is treated to leg of lamb for dinner.

'Oh no, it's Captain Kebab.'

"Just another advantage of genetic engineering."

Marylou! That l'il porker's come back, let's celebrate an' have us a bar-b-que!

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

'Oh, stop it, George! I hate this part of grocery shopping as much as you do.'

"Surprise...! I made you a nice breakfast of bacon, ham, and sausage..."

"I may have gone disco, Mrs. Mullins, but that doesn't mean my meats are no longer choice lean cuts competitively priced for today's cost-conscious consumer."

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

'Steak Ted?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Rump roast?"

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

Important Food Groups

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Butcher's shop has 'Cuts of salami' sign: End, Middle, Other End.

Cow of BEEF

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

Would you mind putting the barbecue out?

Platter confusion.

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."