Measurement Master Gifts

Whatever ran over the poor guy really left some marks. Tape measure.

'I thought you said 36 inch neck and 16 inch sleeve.'

"I am sorry to inform you that you are displaying early signs of senile dimensiona Mr Johnson."

"I prefer the metric system. 18 centimeters sounds better than 7 inches."

Face painting.

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"It seemed like miles to me!"

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

"Build it 300 cubits long? I thought you said centimetres!"

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

'Happy now?'

'This is my natural habitat.'

'Hey! Make sure those boots are muddy before you set foot in here,mister! Took me all morning to get this place filthy!'

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

Untidy bedroom

"I can never go metric. 'Al's 30.48 Centimeter Hot Dogs' just doesn't sound right."

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Irritable gentleman disturbed by a bluebottle

"It kind of puts it all in perspective, doesn't it?"

Cubits? Haven't You gone metric yet?

"I like the metric system. My weight in kilograms is less than my weight in pounds."

'Please don't read anything into the minutes, Ms. Thomas. Just reading the minutes will suffice.'

'That's it boy! Find the floor!'

'I was interested to see that you're living in a complete pigsty. Ours isn't quite finished yet.'

Man throwing food on floor in the excitement of a goal

"How many times have I told you not to play mechanic under the car."