Meal Musers Gifts

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

"Hey, waiter! This homework is burnt to a crisp!"

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

The Aisle

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

"It's not he worst meal I've ever eaten, that was your dinner yesterday."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"I have a strong personal commitment to dinner."

"It's just that I would be more thankful if we had roast beef."

'Your meal should be along shortly. Frank just went out to hunt it.'

"And then it hit me: I got up early for THIS? A slimy, cold worm? I HATE worms!"

Cafe Philosophique

'Would you believe, humble pie?'

Food Blog

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

'Yuck! My creamed corn is polluting my mashed potatoes!'

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

Grandchildren's Menu: Whatever's on your plate and no funny business

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

"The steak is here to give its full consent."

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

"I thought I told you not to drink your milk."

'Just as I suspected - cheating on our diet!'

'I wish I had eaten all that bread.'

'Sure I'd like to have everything but where would I put it?'

This time, Eddie was going to pay for this.