Meal Musers Pillows

Who wants to say grace? Grace! Ames! Would you please show the kids how it's done? Ok. Thank you. That's it? I could have said that! Amen.

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

"Hey, waiter! This homework is burnt to a crisp!"

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

The Aisle

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

"It's not he worst meal I've ever eaten, that was your dinner yesterday."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"I have a strong personal commitment to dinner."

"It's just that I would be more thankful if we had roast beef."

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

"And then it hit me: I got up early for THIS? A slimy, cold worm? I HATE worms!"

Food Blog

'Your meal should be along shortly. Frank just went out to hunt it.'

Cafe Philosophique

'Would you believe, humble pie?'

Grandchildren's Menu: Whatever's on your plate and no funny business

'Yuck! My creamed corn is polluting my mashed potatoes!'

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

"The steak is here to give its full consent."

'Just as I suspected - cheating on our diet!'

'I wish I had eaten all that bread.'

"I thought I told you not to drink your milk."

Morning Procrastination

'Sure I'd like to have everything but where would I put it?'

Eggs. Hot cake. Ernie, you eat the same stuff for breakfast every morning! He's a cereal monogamist!