Humor Mealtime Musers Pillows

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

'What a day! - the computer broke down, and I had to cook manually!'

What makes the flies in your soup "artisanal"? I know, right? Personally, I think it's just a lot of hype perpetrated by the flies. Menu.

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

"May we see your kids' menu please?"

"It's not he worst meal I've ever eaten, that was your dinner yesterday."

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

"Honey, will you text grace, please?"

'He isn't use to getting up this early.'

'The doctor said I was ready for solids, but not this solid!'

'What's your thumb doing on my steak?' 'Want me to drop it again?'

"I'll have the crescent-crab 'purses' and the smoked duck 'hash' – hold the quotation marks."

"J'entends le poulet qui arrive!"

'Waiter, is it raining?' ] 'Sorry, not my table.'

'Are you still eating your breakfast? I want to lay the table for lunch.'

'What's your favourite meal?' 'Seconds.'

"Waiter! Waiter! There's no flies in my soup!"

Try to cut down on your salt intake.

'What's the special?'

Who wants to say grace? Grace! Ames! Would you please show the kids how it's done? Ok. Thank you. That's it? I could have said that! Amen.

Have you said grace? No, we said grace yesterday, this is leftovers!

"If so many things taste like chicken, why did God make chickens?"

"Ladies ladies, please. There's enough of me to go around."

"In lieu of a tip, can one of you take a shift for me?"

"Wanna trade an Easter ham salad for an Easter egg salad?"

"Chinese food? I'll call it in if you'll pick it up."

"Is the rabbit cute?"

'He's trying to figure out how to install a snooze alarm.'

'My name is Angel. No relation to the angel hair pasta.'

'Early morning is the best time to attack your prey: Before they have the chance to drink their coffee...'

"Let me guess, Mr Saunders - the early shift is too early for you?!"