Matchday Organizer Pillows

'Structural strength test? Next door!'

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

'You can't beat the excitement of a new county season.'

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'If you're proposing, Nigel, get it done before full time!'

'But Mum, I've got a match after school...'

'The Cup Final's just starting-think I should wake him?'

'He does what he wants - I blame that new manager, Mourinho!'

'Going 'cold turkey' might be dangerous...I'd wean him off by letting him watch world cup re-runs....'

'Oh come on, I'm sure she'll still be there after Match of the Day's finished...'

'We're in a hurry.'

"So, after five glorious weeks, football is coming home!"

Ref shows footballer green card.

'I wonder who they'll bring on as manager for the second half.'

Footballer.

'I know it's an early kick off but this is ridiculous!'

"I promised I'd bring him - he could never afford to come when he was alive."

"Why do footballers never shake a fist when they miss?"

"Buona Sera, Mrs. Johnson! You ordered two pizzas. That's £18!"

A typical Newcastle fan.

"Wait, is this a playdate?"

'Goodness me referee one really must question your visual acuity.'

'Early evening kick-off for the Gunners, is it, Henderson?'

“Worst. Playdate. Ever.”

Football Applause

'There it goes, there it goes, there it goes...'

"What sports fan are you?"

'Yes, he was there his afternoon - that's his balloon floating in the penalty area.'

Football players walk onto the pitch holding childrens' hands, who are holding rag dolls.

Football today

'These oxygen tanks go with your tickets. Where you're sitting, you'll need them.'

'I thought I would never find a place to park, dear.'