Master Of Time-off Escapes Gifts

"We scheduled all our vacations so that it will be impossible to hold any meetings next month."

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

'That's right, we're going all the way to the top floor ... I'm late for a meeting!'

'You can earn more money, but you'll need to take a second job.'

'As usual, I'm right on time. My internal alarm clock always wakes me just as theses meetings are over.'

"We're looking for someone who'll be available twenty four-seven."

"He's highly qualified to be our new associate pastor but he wants all weekends and holidays off - the same days I want off."

"Congratulations on your entertaining presentation skills Smith, and the way they hide your dismal sales figures!"

'I need a Vacation.'

Planned service changes

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

"I've got to be honest. It's going to be hard to find you a position that offers 40 days of personal time."

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'

Chillaxing!

'You get 104 personal day. They're called Saturdays and Sundays.'

"Your holiday is finished George, get over it!"

'The fish couldn't be more fresh.'

Freedom, Liberty and 5:01 on a Friday.

'You know, Mertins, when you take a vacation day, you can actually stay at home.'

'What's procrastination?'

"Taking 'one day at a time' is a nice thought, but here you're expected to take three days at a time."

"Fred is the counterpoint to a perpetual motion machine."

"I'm leaving early, before mission creep takes over."

'What've you got in the way of long term sick holidays ?'

golf

"I'm in the middle of something. Can I call you right back?"

"Wait—before we go any further, I'm beginning to have serious doubts about the wheelman."

KEYS TO SUCCESSFUL MEETINGS: Don't be distracted by non-essential activities, no matter how much fun they may be.

"This is supposed to be the office part of working from home."

'I really admire Paul. He's able to switch off work once he leaves the office.'

'We can't give you family leave so you can have time away from your husband and kids.'

Coming in first place is yet another average New Yorker late for work.

Yeah, I'm totally snowed in. I can't even get to my car... - 'Yeah, the ice hasn't quite thawed yet. Safer to stay where I am...' - 'Listen, it's virtually the weekend...' -

Man with a busy schedule

Hey, Rudy, I hear you've got the day off on Wednesday. What's it to you? I thought we'd hang out together. Say it again? Just the two of us, hanging out, doing some shopping, spending quality time. Sorry, I must have something wrong with my hearing. It'll be fun. You little @#$%. Commit! What's your game, you old bat?!