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Then / Now

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

The new normal

'Surely they're not ALL still in their offices!'

Medieval headlines.

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

"Thou Shalt not Covid thy Neighbor's Wife!"

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

"Gotta go. My ten o'clock is here."

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

"I knew a breakfast meeting would be a mistake."

Agatha Christie

Dronin'

"My great-uncle Lupe owned a barber shop! He made a lot of money!"

'All those opposed, signify by using the usual sign.'

"OK, I'll tell you what I know, but I can't reveal my source."

Department de Philosophie

George Smith Patton

"Social distancing... masks, it's difficult sometimes to know who you're talking to."

"So did you have to wear a mask when you were sunbathing?"

"Cautious and considerate? Door on the left, one mask each. Selfish and ignorant? Door on the right, do as you please."

"I'm not taking any chances!"

"It needs some work, but it does have good bones."

"At least we don't have to worry about dudes telling us to smile more."

Start of the school year

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

"All in favor of toupees, say aye."

'Loose zips cause trips, Robert.'

"I'm glad I found the time to join this meeting, otherwise we wouldn't see each other in years!"

Muzzles.

Houdini tries to get out of dinner with his in-laws.

'I've been a model, a film star, a soap star, a dress designer... next I'm going to write a children's book and after that...'

"I see something horrible in your future; death... mayhem... EVIL... wait a see, it's just a fingerprint."