Marriages Gifts

"We've been married for twenty-five years. Perhaps we should remove the last remaining can."

Just Married

'This is to strengthen mutual trust.'

A short man with a tall wife is said to have married beneath him.

You're my Mona Lisa.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Demure lady with gloves

Lesbian civil partnership.

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

A heart shaped cake

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Wedding Day Itinerary.