Marriage Breakdown Gifts

Maude gets rid of all the useless stuff that is cluttering up the house on Ebay.

Amazing.com

"You've come to the right lawyer. I not only do divorces, I also specialise in bankruptcy proceedings."

'There's really no need for confusion. Part 95 of section 33 of Article L in your prenuptial agreement clearly states ... '

'I'm cooking for a man who can give me what I want - An undisclosed divorce settlement!'

"It's not you, it's your hormone changes."

"It's a 'get worse soon card' from your ex wife."

Quickie Divorce Site

"Since when do you have fact checkers?"

"We need to talk."

"My wife's leaving me because of my gambling."

"Isn't it time you went on a farewell tour somewhere?"

During lockdown Janet and I divided up our friends. You got me!"

"My gut instinct was to say yes. . . but years in social work have shown me how these things end up working out."

Domestics

Revenge pawn

"My ex wife is a heart surgeon. . . she ripped my heart out!"

"Before you go can you get me another beer?"

"Honey, you've forgotten your grief case."

"It made him very happy to know that he was going to die before you could get here."

Congratulations on your Divorce

'Harland, we want a divorce.'

THE EX-FILES, 'It's about people who have trouble with their former spouses.'

'My wife left me, but the good news is I get to keep the igloo...'

'Breaking news. . . I've just found out my wife has left me.'

Divorce Cases Our Speciality.

Relate

DIVORCE COURT, 'What? -- You hid the remote during the SUPERBOWL!'

First straw, last straw and the ones inbetween.

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

'What? You ate the gateau instead of throwing it into my face?? You insensitive, egotistical brute! You don't love me anymore!'

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

'You've got Mr & Mrs Smith at 2.00, Mr & Mrs Jones at 2.30, and at 3.00 your wife has made an appointment with a Divorce Lawyer!'

Parson and abandoned husband