Market Philosopher T-Shirts

'Was it Nietzsche who said, whatever doesn't kill your portfolio makes it stronger?'

'Come back in two months the meaning of life can change, depending if the market is bullish or bearish.'

'Eddie, it's the market's way of saying 'there are other important things in life besides money.'

'The Dow goes up. The down goes down. Yin. Yang.'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

'I think I know what the problem is!'

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

'It's crunch time, Caldwell. That's the time between when you're born, and when you make your first million.'

Stock market investment advice

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

Flat tax - equal burden?

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

US dollar perched on fragile house of cards.

Aggressive growth fund loses money shorting gold.

Stockbroker and Psychotherapist: Money won't make you happy and therapy won't make you rich.

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

'. . .actually I'm not a real Guru, I was forced up here originally by the property prices.'

'I'm worried about all these unemployed. They're still on our payroll'

'Competition is good...unless it's too good.'

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

"Money is life's report card."

'Give it to me straight, Mr. Erskine. Is there a downside to unmitigated greed?'

The Invisible Hand of the Market

"You're allowed to think outside the box, as long as you stay inside the margins."

Money god

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

Economic Downturns

Worked Well In Groups...