Maritime Boarders Gifts

"Shred the plank."

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

When laundry ruled the waves.

Relationship Warning Lights

Boat wedding.

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

No caption. (On a pirate ship various flags fly, including flags with a skull and crossbones and other banners showing logos from various social media sites. On the boat deck below, a pirate is looking at his cell phone).

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Sea weed harvest.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Bedroom Traffic Control

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"International trade"

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

'Hey, get out of my space!'

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

Victorian Royal Navy

The grazing deck of the Titanic.

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

'We're drifting apart.'

Suez Canal Curse

"Gasp! Pant! Is it good for you, Marjorie?"

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'

Man guarding a written border.

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

Titanic 100th anniversary