Maritime Boarders Mugs

"Shred the plank."

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

When laundry ruled the waves.

Relationship Warning Lights

Boat wedding.

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Sea weed harvest.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Bedroom Traffic Control

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"International trade"

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

'Hey, get out of my space!'

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

'We're drifting apart.'

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

Man guarding a written border.

"Gasp! Pant! Is it good for you, Marjorie?"

Victorian Royal Navy

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

The grazing deck of the Titanic.

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

Titanic 100th anniversary

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"