Marital Mishap Enthusiast Pillows

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

So all is not rosy in the garden?

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

Mrs Cat waiting for Mr Cat coming home late.

"I know it's 3 a.m. but don't you think this is a good time to discuss spending the holidays with my mother."

"I love marriage...It's my husband I hate."

"I married for contrast."

'I'm not the sitting tenant, I'm your husband.'

Apply to marry multi-marriage failure.

Gender Symbols

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, for whatever that's worth these days.'

"Why, it's a little piece of red yarn! Oh Harold, you always know JUST what to get me."

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."

"Now, if something happens to your marriage, do you want do-not resuscitate?"

"Well, Pook, here's to one old marriage that just won't go away."

"That's Stuart and Vivian Muntner. They're a one-marriage family."

"I went ahead and got married without knowing the possible side effects."

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

'They have TWO trees!'

"What makes a happy marriage - how should I know? Ask your mother."

"A special offer from the Beatrice Wiggins Marriage Bureau they may be - but I'm afraid it's still bigamy, sir..."

Old Man and Women

"And will you, Lee, take Mimi for granted as long as you both shall live."

"My husband's lost some interest...can you tattoo me into a giant remote control?"

The widow's intended: 'Well, Tommy, has your mother told you of my good fortune.' Tommy: 'No. She only said she was going to marry you!'

'Will you marry me, Miss?'

"This is a great place to work...they give you a day off every time you get married!"

'My husband took these pills to give him some get up and go, and the next thing I knew, he got up and went.'

'Hey - did that last couple have problems or what?'