Romantic Mishap Enthusiasts Pillows

"It was a great first date. And I loved hearing how your body stores fat differently than other people."

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

"Simple tasks were a challenge for Chad. Awww, geez. Another upside down spoon."

"I never understand what you're trying to say."

A sporting gent practising for the hunting season.

"Sorry I'm late: I was hitching a ride but when the driver noticed me, he panicked and we had an accident..."

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

'Next time make sure it's the bath plug before you pull it out.'

Ballerina kicking another dancer in the face.

'Maybe now you'll admit that we're lost!?'

"Please excuse our new employee, sir--he used to work in the circus."

Duncan made a real faux pas when he heard that his blind date was expecting a baby.

"Ok, George ... now you've ruined Christmas."

'My ad said I was 'blond with curves' it didn't say anything about me being a woman.'

"Ted! It's fallen down! Ted!"

"You might want to take this. It's your wife."

Campanology wasn't really Gregory's thing!

"Public display of rejection"

'Bruce, your dingleberry's ringing'

OK, I'm a little shallow, but I'm meaningful.

"I don't like sweetcorn".

"Hell, I'm from the dating agency. Can I move in with you."

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

'I guess I should have let sleeping dogs lie.'

Sadly, Ralph's third attempt at the World Fishbowl Speed Record was also his last.

"So you spilled your soda, big deal!"

Golf Cart Punctures

'You were right - it WASN'T a cat with a racing stripe.'

'It's the blind date who arranged to meet you inside.'

Vacuum-salesman clown gets door slammed on his foot.

"Sorry, I haven't had chance to watch much TV since I went to turn down the radio, tripped over a magazine and a framed poster fell on my head..."

Ooops!

'I know I said you should part your hair down the middle, but...'

Hey Siri, dictate a note. What would you like to say? Shhh!!! Whisper, Siri! I'm trying to dictate an article about our hostage-takers without them hearing I'm a journalist. I'm sorry. I didn't quite get that. He said "I'm trying to dictate and article about our hostage-takers without them hearing I'm a journalist." Thanks.

This end up - You idiot.