Manicure Maestro Pillows

'Let's go, let's go! Get back on the track!'

'We're cutting staff - I'll keep your details on our file.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

Your Guide to Winning Movember

Kirsten Johnson

"If I knew when this was going to end, it wouldn't be so stressful."

Hair Traffic control.

'Are you done yet?'

Computer Music

New Fads For The Handlebar Mustache

Pollsters

Two men discussing thier moustaches

'If you increase the magnification another million times you can see the safety regulations.'

"Some 'King'. They didn't even give me an N95."

'The idea of an artists' retreat is to get AWAY from business concerns, Mr. Harlow.'

'Mess with me if you have to, son, but not with the regimental moustache!'

The Cartoonist's armoury

'They could use a great camouflage expert like you in the army, Mom.'

ACCOUNTANT-IN-RESIDENCE: "John, we're going to have to cut back on the cadmiums."

'With all these new surveillance cameras around town, I'm not going anywhere without full-make-up.'

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

Other men just sing in the bath

'That brush - how many dpi?'

"I have the smokey eyes look. Can the doctor still give me an eye exam?"

Fifty ways to style your nasal hair.

How to wear a false moustache.

"Taxi's waiting."

Book and magician

Husband concerned about being late whilst wife has plastic surgery.

"Admit it ... you were hexting while driving again."

'Nothing to do? Why don't you read the refrigerator.'

'You need to slow down - use more color.'

Hipster Ventriloquist Convention