Mammoth Maven Gifts

'The next time he misses the paper, we're giving him away.'

'Well...It's woolly. And it's mammoth. So it's probably a woolly mammoth.'

Muscles

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

"Ninja bread men"

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

Myths and legends...

"Was that my pager or yours?"

Ski lift mobile

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

Nature Lovers

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

'Sorry, you're just not built right for weightlifting.'

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

Life is ghoul

'Knock it off, Gus! This is tough enough without your yodeling!'

Body Building Mishap

Facial hair continental drift.

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

Tour guide: 'And there's where we'll be setting up camp folks. Just at the base of that foothill.'

"My biggest strength is probably my quads."

"Tony and Stephanie are from Iowa."

The cry rang out. "There's gold in that there castle in the sky!" And the great beanstalk rush of 1849 had begun.

"I love strong coffee."

'I'll accept that excuse for now, but you need to have a brain by Monday.'

"Wife and two hernias to support!"

strong man bends an iron bar

'It's the people downstairs again.'

'Poor Adam -- he lost his head start ALREADY.'

"It's funny...back when I first signed up to 'Adopt an Endangered Manatee', I thought they just wanted me to send money. Instead, little Julia came along and changed my life forever."

George Smith Patton

"Actually I'm doing this to stand out more in the scholarly community."