Malware Master T-Shirts

'He knows where the viruses are buried.'

Face painting.

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

Gym. Weight Room. This must be sculpting my body --- All my muscles feel like putty.

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

Magic coat fixing problems while walking the dog.

Important Muscles.

'This is my natural habitat.'

'Happy now?'

"That didn't work either! I'm telling you, this is one AGGRESSIVE virus!"

TV Chef Cooking Range

'Hey! Make sure those boots are muddy before you set foot in here,mister! Took me all morning to get this place filthy!'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

'This bed comes with a remote monster-under-the-bed option.'

Untidy bedroom

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

"The instructions state that some anger, frustration and confusion is expected."

Pest control, with death.

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Irritable gentleman disturbed by a bluebottle

Claviers

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

Germ Home

'I was interested to see that you're living in a complete pigsty. Ours isn't quite finished yet.'

'That's it boy! Find the floor!'

Man throwing food on floor in the excitement of a goal

"One day, many years from now, we'll look back at this and laugh."

Microwave - 'Table 19 sends compliments to the chef!'