Mystic Master T-Shirts

Change of Management - Fortunes Told

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"I wanted a Meticulous Monday or a Thorough Thursday report. This reads more like a Frivolous Friday."

'Can you get me in touch with people that own me money?'

The original sundial.

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

'Watch this! Open up a straw by scrunching up its wrapper! Now put a drop of water on that wrinkly paper tube! Check it out! It wiggles and grows!'

'That line means good managerial skills!'

Book and magician

'Can you make this one disappear?'

"I have to know how it's done."

Career coaching at a yoga studio

"Admit it ... you were hexting while driving again."

'You don't get it, Wacenee, the gods being angry keeps us in business!'

"Of course, black magic is more expensive than white magic. Do you think that the pigments are free?"

"If you have to ask, you can't understand the answer."

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that.'

'You're the finest escape artist we've ever had.'

Fortune Teller using a satellite to help pick up clairvoyant signals.

Tarot Lying

'I can't do next Friday'

"Right, - I've released the Kraken....um...er....now how do I retrieve the Kraken...?"

"Tell him I'd like to speak to his supervisor."

Business man with magnifying glass

"I react mindlessly, therefore I am."

Graduation Day At Telekinesis School

Moses and the Screenwriter: 'Accurate-Shmaccurate...if you want this story to sell, it needs some punching up.'

Dragons eating a knight - 'Once you get the shell off they're delicious!'

'Help! My retainers have me trapped by refrigerator magnets!'

"Any luck with decoding the competition's super secret internal communications?"

Crime section in a library.

"Look, I can make rabbits disappear."

"Giving up cigarettes and alcohol MIGHT make you live longer, but it will certainly feel like it!"

Fortune teller in smoking section.