Mall Rat T-Shirts

Teenage refrigerators hangin' at the mall. 'Your hat is cool.' 'No, dude,you're cool!' 'You guys are both cool!'

Only 1248 More Shopping Days Till the Millennium

'Can you believe it? Mom expects me to use REAL money.'

Complaints (just kidding).

"What's this, an 'A' in mall attendance?!"

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

'She hasn't advanced to figure eights yet.'

Biceps, muscles and brawn

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

A Sticky Buns Bakery is positioned next to a gym.

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

Gym Dog

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

"Oh, puhleeese. No one's going to steal your idea."

'Hey, there are pedals on this thing!'

Early Exercise Machines

"I don’t care that muscle weighs more than fat. I only know I work out here and gain 5 pounds!"

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

'I wished I'd known about this club last week. I'm really stressed out at my job!'

Pirates at the mall.

Battery lifting weights

'Look honey! I can touch my knees!'

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

"I think I'm in the wrong kind of spin class!"

Ring for Service.

Body Building

The price of chocolate has gone through the roof!

"I'm just gonna do one more set."

Apocalliptical

'Do you feel the burn?', 'Yes -- in fact, I think my pancreas is scorched.'

"Seven, eight, nine, ten..."

"Croissants? Donuts? Chocolate? Good price, madame! Good price!"