Mail Room Staff Gifts

"Sending letters instead of emails keeps the balls out of my court longer."

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

'I'd give you a raise, but I had to throw tantrums to make my parents give me anything as a kid.'

We're transferring you to company headquarters so you can kiss company hindquarters.

A dog postal worker delivers through a letterbox in a doggy door.

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'Harold is the brains behind the Smudge-o-Rama mailer.'

'Grrrr....'

Library Computer Center: Cybrarian

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

Sometimes I feel the company would collapse if we weren't here.

'That book is still floating around the system.'

Library Grand Opening

'Cold hard facts are good, but to complete the picture, here's Brenda from the mailroom with some hot, juicy gossip.'

'Botox.'

"I think somebody thinks I've been away from my desk too long."

"As a cub I got fed up with circus life, so I took a job in the mail room."

Larry's snout was as clean as a whistle...this made some a little edgy.

"I'm sure you do spend all your time here at the office, but could you please stop having your mail delivered here?"

"I told you when you moved into Dr. Condee's office that his bookshelves were due to collapse any day."

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

With absolutely no warning, Phil crossed the fine line separating business from pleasure and was never heard from again.

'When I said, throw him out, I didn't mean it literally.'

'With government cyber snooping, we must communicate through channels no one would ever suspect...the postal service.'

"Thank goodness, it was only 'light' reading..."

"The buck stops next door"

"Do you have any picture books that could help a child understand tort reform?"

This Side Up.

"These EHR formats are an indecipherable headache to try and wade through. I miss the old days when the doctor's writing was all we had to figure out."

Boss catches employee sleeping his way to the top.

'Sir, the Christmas party is well prepared. We've got champagne, wine, beer, food and five canister of carpet cleaner.'

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure you're single-handedly keeping the U.S. postal service in business."

"You've got to compress it because my email account is limited to 3MB."

'He hired you! Tough luck.'