Magical Realm Explorer T-Shirts

"The chocolate fudge and whipped cream is okay. But you should have sought planning permission for the giant cherry on the roof!"

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

J. R. R. Tolkien

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"He's his own worst enemy."

“If I start pressing these, I’ll never ever ever get out of here.”

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

The Frog Prince

One of the Three Little Pigs reaches puberty.

The search for Bigfoot continues for a group of women who know that if his feet are THAT big...

"Well, looks like Bob has hooked another baby kraken."

'No not there. Let's try it over here this time...'

"Dad, I checked a book out at the library...can you read it with me?"

Fellow Sheep of the Ring

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

Odysseus starts regretting his return to Ithaca.

"Forget the palm dearie...I'll read yer race."

Nothing is Lost Everything is Transformed.

This little pig's house was a facade.

'Pirate's Cove is about a half mile down the beach.'

Magic Ring to gain entry into Tolkien Archive

Nostradamus.

"Lately, I've thinking about getting a motorcycle ... "

'You're King Kong? You look bigger in the movies.'

'I may charge a lot but you get much more through me. I'm a psychic large.'

A minotaur in a cubicle labyrinth

The Landlord Of The Rings

"Must go now Zelda. The builders have just arrived"

"I have grave news."

"She has to arouse you, without, of course, actually arousing you."

"Remember the night in the Tetons when we smoked so much weed we thought we were hallucinating?"

"Well, well – if it isn't the old crystal ball and chain."

Palm Reader...

"Now...this piece of paper will reveal even more."