Mad Scientist Humor Gifts

'Remove the fur and claws and these genetically engineered apples taste just fine.'

"I cloned myself to take care of my Thanksgiving duties while I watch football in peace."

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

The Solar System (after deregulation)

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Early cyborg.

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Schrodinger's Black Box

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

It is said there is a black hole in the middle of the galaxy. But heaven knows what it looks like!

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

How Glaciations Begin

'I'm a do-it-yourselfer, but I've never been a done-it-yourselfer...'

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

The new Physics