Macho Musings Gifts

The men thing...

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

'I just love that little fluffy grey kitten!'

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Important Muscles.

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Soldiers' Ego

"Fill'er up with testosterone."

Alpha males through the ages!

"Look, Papi...you need to take care of yourself. You don't have to be macho and proud and scared of being weak!"

"This is all my own hair."

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

'He eats his yogurt and carrot sticks out of a grease-stained brown bag to preserve his macho image.'

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

Arm and leg wrestling.

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

"If it's your chair, man up and get him out of it!"

'My speed limit is bigger than yours.'

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

'Well, that's just great, we're lost...but will Mr. Macho stop and ask for directions? Ohhh, no!'

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.

The Men Thing. . .

"Do you ever feel as though the portfolio of your manhood should have included combat?"

Office worker leans back on chair. Woman says: 'Sorry, but that does not make you a risk-taker.'

Macho Males: Putin and Obama