Macho Pride Bro Gifts

'Well, that's just great, we're lost...but will Mr. Macho stop and ask for directions? Ohhh, no!'

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Important Muscles.

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Soldiers' Ego

Alpha males through the ages!

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"This is all my own hair."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

'I looked into their eyes before I shot them, with my high-powered rifle, from half a mile away.'

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

Man with many tattoos.

'He eats his yogurt and carrot sticks out of a grease-stained brown bag to preserve his macho image.'

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

Arm and leg wrestling.

'I want my money back -- I'm still a wuss.'

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

"Why don't we call it a draw?"

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

The Men Thing. . .

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

'He's a big softie really'.

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.

'Bad hairy-chest day.'