Machine Modifier Gifts

"Clarence thinks he's hot stuff now that he got the portable DR tricked out."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Congratulations on your retirement!

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

Man and Machine snoozing

Institute for Artificial Intelligence.

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

"Can you help me? I'm having a little trouble working the shredder."

'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

To scare the pants off of kids who threw snowballs at his car, Ray outfitted it with exploding fake body panels.

"I'll have filet mignon, and she'll have the chef whip up something with no meat, dairy, wheat, soy or flavor."

Digger.

"Let me guess...you got a job here because you needed new parts for your lowrider project?"

Quantum Mechanics Mechanics working on Atoms

Factory foreman says: 'Sometimes the machines here do try to take over the world. Last week the coffee maker even had a go.'

"What setting do I use for this?"

'French onion soup. Hold the soup.'

'About this 50% error rate of yours, Billington . . .'

Frank and Ernest's Amended Sayings. "Everything comes to he who waits..." "But it will be used!"

'Are they street legal, and do you have some insecurity thing going on?'

'Now we can receive e-mail!'

'I told him not to install central air.'

The dunger

Robots/inspected.

"My next car, I want one of those."

Aviation Inspection and Maintenance. Ernie, coffee is not a quick fix for metal fatigue.

Nature rebels against the machine

'How much to let the fenders out a little?'

Convert your lawn tractor into a hot-looking 'sports car' and save hundreds a year on insurance!

For years he had spent every free moment working on his perpetual motion machine. So far, he was up to 18 seconds.

'In light of today's general moral outrage, we're taking Devil's Food Cake off the menu.'

Suddenly Jimmy didn't feel so alone in the world.

'It says it works so fast, it's accumulated seven thousand years of vacation with pay.'

'Do you have another menu of what I can have?'