Machine Learning Maven Gifts

'I shall now hand over to our guest speaker, management unit XT-56.'

"Ambitions . . . to replace mankind."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Drool Marks

Math Major Pennants. ISOSCELES. SCALENE EQUILATERAL.

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

Corporate Team Building. Team. Hey, everybody, I've just been told our CEO fled the country while we've been doing our truth exercises.

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

'Sometimes, from time to time, occasionally I wish I'd never bought that ruddy thesaurus!'

Human Brain

"It's been unanimously decided that we don't like this table. Could you show us another model?"

Jerk Gene

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

"There can be no doubt. This proves it. We gotta have more cow bell."

"You're doing great - keep it up."

Psychiatry ward with 'Inhibited' and 'Outgoing' trays.

'U.S. Manufacturing'

At the Halloween party down there, one fat molecule is dressed as an angel and another as a devil. Makes sense, there are good gars and bad fats. The antibody is wearing a cape. Everybody's been calling him a superhero so he dressed like one. That virus wasn't invited but he sneaked in dressed as the long ranger. He's always showing up where he's not wanted. The ironic thing is the virus is wearing a mask.

Math 2B- Shakespeare, yes or no?

'What do you mean you 'don't want to go down that road'? That's the career path.'

Doubling Gloucester Cheeses

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"This is your great, great uncle Orlando. He was a great mathematician, but a little cheap. He always picked up the check at restaurants...but only to make sure the math was right."

"I utilize the best from Freud, the best from Jung and the best from my uncle Marty, a very smart fellow."

"And then they came out with a desktop model."

"Secondhard carbs"

(Experimental dessert) (Pi à la mode)

"Before we analyze the data, we must analyze the person who came up with the data."

Sugestshun Box: Spelling test.