Luxurious Lounge Lovers T-Shirts

Because the company does not offer employees a healthcare plan, we try to boost their compensation in other ways."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

Couch Potatoes

This is the first time I've been on the top management floor.

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

Happy Brithday

"I'm not 'just sitting here' — my mind is all over the place."

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"I was hoping to make billions, but I've settled for making millions."

"Why did we wait to get recliners?"

'I'm able to live the American dream by getting paid in Euros, running my business form an offshore tax haven and getting European style universal health care.'

"....At least we don't have to put quarters in this hot tub."

'I'd say the couch is contouring a bit TOO much to their bodies.'

Mile High Club

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

'Harold's grandfather was one of the inventors of the hula-hoop.'

Champagne and Oysters

"Well, sometimes I'll just hang around and do nothing. Oh wait, that's all the time."

"Thanks, baby. Ciao."

Just Married an Oil Baron

'I do like the moat.'

'I hope we don't start getting competition from redundant bankers homes.'