Lover Of Zen Humor Gifts

Valentine for Guru.

"Look! No hands!"

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

Gardening Calendar: January - The Snow will be deep now...get out into the garden...

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

"You are still here."

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

The Hammer

Public footpath on a desert island.

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'I AM a magician! When I wake up granddad from his nap, I turn Gramps into Grumps!'

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Where Are They Now?'

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

'You're a good man, Henderson, but you don't have your staff's respect.'

"I'll have dessert first."

"Fit the reality to our statistics!"

Zenboni

'Whoops. There goes one of my prostheses.'

Clown's knee reflex sends doctor through ceiling

Healthy Eating Casualties

New anti-obesity cookbook.

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

"In this series, the artist is in dialogue with her printer."

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

"Sir? - it's clowntime."

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

'I really felt at home there. The food was awful!'

"…And what do you think the cracker might represent?"