Lover Of Quirky Celebrations Pillows

"Running of the the chickens!? This is crazy! Dad, no one celebrates Hispanic Heritage Month like this!"

Bubbly

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

'Trains traditionally run late, it rains on bank holidays and Yorkshire pudding is a main course.'

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Fred, Sam, Brian, John, Walter, Jeff...."

Festive squad

Celebrate National Submarine Day.

"Not lengthways you idiot!!"

"Happy new year!"

Masks to buy while buying embarrassing products.

'Even the Easter Bunny has to make a living the other 364 days a year, you know.'

Sal's Birthday Cart

'Guy Fawkes and trick or treat - two for the price of one for one night only - please give generously.'

Greece

'We, too, celebrate Hallowe'en.'

"I'm worried that not everyone knows I'm a vegan!"

Puppet Show from the Stocks

The Ring Bearer

Crater Lake Annual Yogurt Guzzle! This year's flavor: Raspberry Marijuana.

'Well,it's been real nice chatting with you Ron,and should you ever fancy a guided tour throughout the City Morgue,here's my card...' (a morgue worker handing over a 'toe tag').

Castaways at Christmas

"Picture this: it's my birthday, my mistress comes towards me with a cake and then, she sets it alight! I was so scared I've been feral ever since!"

A sign in the front window of a bookstore says "Meet the Pope 2 p.m."

A Redneck Christmas

Poinsettia, From Mexico to the World

"It's always the same at this time of year..."

Four men in kilts.

Building a snowman

"She just loved baths, so, so much."

'This year I did it the other way around...I first celebrated the New Year and then Christmas...Nobody noticed.'

"Time to blow out the candles. Take a deep breath....Ok. Let's try something easier. Take a shallow, raspy breath."

Couple on their way to a wedding. Woman says: 'Apparently, the church is so small we're only allowed to thrown short-grain rice.'

"I'm celebrating one year of abstinence from alcohol."

'This must be your lucky day, madam. Not only am I a Jehovah's Witness - I'm also selling double glazing.'