Lover Of Farm Humor Gifts

Milking the Cow.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

"Static cling."

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

"I'm an enigma!"

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

"YAY! FREE SHIPPING!"

"That's... yikes. I mean... what's even going on down there? Honey, I don't think a push-up bra is very flattering on you."

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"All good: This egg looks healthy as well..."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

'I think you need an electrician here, rather than a veterinarian.'

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

I'm WAAAY beyond Kinder Surprise!

Grassy breath?

'She says her stomachs ache.'

Clang clang. Uncle Ernie, why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work.

Sheep with its wool unwinding because it's snagged on a tree

'I LOVE YOU GUYS!' 'She's been drinking again!'

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

Cow asks the horse for the carrot.

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."