Lover Of Ancient Cultures Gifts

Archaeologists doing a Selfie

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

Julius is writing a memoir of his youth, but doesn't know what to call it. "Caesar's Salad Days"!

"A world without Ovid? I can't even begin to imagine a world without Ovid."

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

An ancient Egyptian exhibit at a museum.

'Look, can't we just build the damn thing next to the quarry?'

Piles of trash discarded by ancient people are a rich source of artifacts for archaeologists. I unearthed garbage dumps that advanced our understanding of prehistoric societies. On the island of Crete I found ancient trash that increased our knowledge about the Minoan people. And I recently uncovered informative Celtic rubbish. Please stop saying studying ancient cultures by what they threw away is "junk science"!

"I'm having my entrails read."

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

'What distinguishes man from the lower animals is the ability to make tools.'

Egyptian chiropractor.

'I don't care if it's a little storage room for King Tut, you still need a building permit and contractor's license.'

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

"All right, let's clam up, everybody. Here comes another expedition."

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

"Yes, but this one is made of Chiclets."

'Hey, Akhem, a Sphinx-er says what?'

Mummy Tourist

We speak hieroglyphics here.

Egyptian Mummy/Egyptian Mummy and Toddler.

'If you don't like it here, why don't you go back to Atlantis?'

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

'Oooh, she has your eyes Horus.'

'Whoa...let's not get ahead of ourselves here, Al...'

Ancient Egyptian crime scenes.

"What's your earliest memory, Sadie?" "You can not get under my skin, loser." "Maybe I can help you figure it out: were people wearing powdered wigs, or were they wearing togas?" "Did they live in primitive huts, or in trees?" "I'm not listening!" "Were they standing upright, or swimming in a primordial sea?" "You're about to be swimming in primordial soup."

Park and Ride dilema

Greek in gallery with Greek statues

"Heads-up, the tourists are coming."

Let's hear a cheer for the sun god! Ra Ra Ra.

"Now if it's a people-mover you're after..."

Easter Island Secret

"Nothing feels better after a long day's hunting than a nice, long soak in the hot-wheel."

"I'm sorry. . . but I can't understand a symbol you're saying."