Love Merger Gifts

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

A fight in the Boardroom.

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

Wall St. or True Love.

Voice coming from wooden horse: 'Quiet Fanshaw! If this hostile take-over bid is going to work we've got to get right inside the boardroom.'

"We structured the deal so it won't make any sense to you."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

Fish and color

'He's ruthless and greedy... so let's make sure he's on our side.'

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

'We have what might be a very good idea...'

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our kingdom has ever known.'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'I'm confident that with the right mix of role-playing exercises and prescription medication we'll make a cohesive team.'

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

'It's okay if don't want to give us control of your company. We're perfectly capable of living with incredible disappointment.'

"I always cry at mergers."

'Our first mistake was hiring an honest accounting firm.'

'A merger will enable us to have more people to blame.'

"I was able to negotiate it from a hostile takeover to an uneasy alliance."

41 Rounds of Layoffs Survived

'The buildings are merging.'

Company Share Price - "The god news is we've become a very attractive takeover target, sir."

The merger hits a snag.

'So, summing up: we 'like' you and you 'like' us.'