Love Mathematician Gifts

"Have you finished working out whether you still love me?"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

Think Tank

Graduation Speech.

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

"When you say you're behind me 100%, do you mean base ten or binary?"

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"How do you love me. Count the ways!"

" A lot of it is just legal mumbo-jumbo."

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

Museum. They were an ancient culture that worshipped the concept of zero. "Nothing" was sacred.

'Would you merge your mutual fund with mine?'

Using Frank Drake's famous equation, Betty calculates the probability of finding intelligent life on a Saturday night.

Pheromones.

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

Recession mathematical equation.

'The batteries in my calculator just died. Good thing I kept the instructions on how to count on my fingers.'

'I've discovered a talking amoeba!' '2+2=4, 5-4=1, 93=3.' SMASH 'I wanted to get it before it multiplied.'

'...in sickness or health, inflation or deflation,marriage tax credit or debit...'

I love maths.

'By the second week of instruction all first-graders should be able to count to one.'

E=MC2, 'You think you're pretty smart, don't you?'

'Remember, a breakthrough is not a breakthrough unless you have some good P.R. for it.'

Sophocles Playwriting School. Euclid and Aphrodite are writing their play together. It must be a love triangle.

''Relativity,' you say? — Well, it can't be any worse than your 'speed bump' theory.'