Love Guide T-Shirts

"I tell only how to "stay"- not "get" married."

'I agreed to a relationship coach, not a referee.'

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

Flyfishing for dummies.

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"You're solemates!"

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"How do I love thee….? Let me count the ways…" "I'm going to want a recount."

'OTHER SIDE!!!' - Learn to Surf

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

"Serenity's cool and all, but when do we get to bliss?"

Rudy tries to assess his relationship with laurel on the gadget scale -- A sophisticated way for a young man to understand his emotions. I would give up my iPod and my iPhone for her. Okay. Then I must ask an essential question. Are you prepared to share passwords? Do I have salesman-customer confidentiality? Depends how much you spend. Computer Villa.

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

Words of Love

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

Tunnel of Temporary Infatuation

"Listen to me, Nathan. Chicks love bad boys."

Everyone agrees: Aunt Juanita needs a man.

Recalculating!

'It WAS rather unkind of you to hide his bottle-opener, Mrs Jones.'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

Actualities - Killing time whilst waiting for the Exhibition to open

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

The Love Psychologists

"All the celebrities come here."

cuPad

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

'Sorry I'm late everybody,I got lost.'