Love Gladiator Pillows

Bed Boxing Ring.

Rage.

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

"Everything's gone up."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

American Football.

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

"Just a routine ID check, Mr. Spartacus - there are lots of people with the same name, you know."

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

'He has some unresolved issues.'

"It was a horrible workplace accident - he tripped and fell into the company rumor mill. Poor devil never knew what hit him!"

"She can be outspoken."

"Are you not infotained?!!"

Football Blockers.

Monster chariot races

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

Why the Romans stopped serving alcohol at sporting events.

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

"My husband can carry up to fifty times his body weight: he's great to go shopping with..."