Game Gladiator Pillows

'I warned you to stay out of those flame wars!'

Rage.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

Bad for you but to die for

"I feel your pain."

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"Everything's gone up."

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

American Football.

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

Punishment for the kicker.

Football.

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

Football Blockers.

'I'm just your average suburban gladiator mum.'

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

Roman Emperor using a glad-hand in an amphitheater

Audiences at the coliseum were down after health and safety had paid a visit.

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

"My husband can carry up to fifty times his body weight: he's great to go shopping with..."

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

Women in grocery store contemplates high and low calories.

Why the Romans stopped serving alcohol at sporting events.

"No, the guy with the bat doesn't get to kill the guys with the mitts."