Gaming Gladiator Pillows

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

"I just don't think someone who's never won an arm-wrestling match in his life has any business engaging in combat."

Leaning tower of pizza boxes.

His family thought he'd been wasting his life, but Steve Wiebe was about to prove everyone wrong.

Rage.

"Our digital assault will leave you at our mercy!"

"You're very non-competitive. I like that in a brother."

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"Everything's gone up."

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

American Football.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

'It's one of those viruses that corrupt every damn thing.'

Football Blockers.

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

'I'm just your average suburban gladiator mum.'

Roman Emperor using a glad-hand in an amphitheater

Audiences at the coliseum were down after health and safety had paid a visit.

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

You Don't Know What It's Like

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

"My husband can carry up to fifty times his body weight: he's great to go shopping with..."