Love And Rebirth Believer Gifts

Phoenix

"Our bond is stronger because we chose each other."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

true love.

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

"I thought I'd come back YOUNG!"

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

"I've finally found my soulmate."

"And do you, Bob, promise to treat Karen as well as you treat your vintage 1950 Indian Blackhawk motorcycle?"

The Confessional: a bored priest listens to a confession.

"Hawaii Five-O" is back? Yeah, but they should call it "Hawaii Version Two Point-0."

'It all started in my previous life, doctor.'

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

'You know, I think this is my most boring reincarnation ever!'

'I am reluctant to offer plastic surgery at this time, Miss Caterpillar: Why don't you let Nature take its course?'

' And after getting an excellent divorce settlement, Cinderella married an even more charming prince, and lived happily ever after.'

Prince trying to climb to Rapunzel. Has a wig in his hands.

Center for Reincarnation Studies. Welcome Back.

Giovanni Pierluigi da Palestrina

"John, how are you gonna Baptize me when you throw like a girl?"

'What fresh hell is this? I just spent 50 grand on hair plugs.'

"Artie, you would not believe what’s going on down there."

'I'm sure that in a previous life I used to be a clown.'

'You seem to be in good spirits.'

"What a screwup. I was only supposed to get a hip replacement."

'The good news is, you're getting reincarnated...the bad news is, you're gonna be a mayfly...you've got five hours!'

Reincarnation is not kind to lawyers!

"That's karma for you! He was once my dog."

"When I die I want to come back as a beautiful swan. And you?"

God Shows His Love In Many Ways...

"An own-goal and a rebound penalty, huh!"

Gay marriage

'It's important to believe in yourself - even when the jury doesn't.'

'Sorry, I failed sex education.'

'Another poor sod selected for reincarnation.'