Long-haul Trip Gifts

Qantas London Sydney

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

"What would you recommend to hold a seven-year-old girl's attention in a car from East Seventy-eighth Street to Bridgehampton?"

"Going to the beach...together as a family! That's what memories are made of! When we get back from this trip, you'll remember it fondly."

'Gasview Hotel' - 'Dinerview Gas' - 'Motelview Diner' - 'Hiwayview Suites'

"Don't make me turn this covered wagon around!"

'Bed & Bagel'

Satellite Navigation for children - "How many more miles is it?"

Scenic selfie site

"Look on the bright side, you never know what's round the corner."

Mom and Dad Really Lose It - 1/4 Mile.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

'I know we're not 'almost there,' but I keep asking just to keep her focused.'

"I'm finally done celebrating the recent election."

A Sat Nav that displays toilet stops

'Stop when you see a clean lake.'

You know you've been working at the same place too long when you get dusted before the file board

The Lonesome Highway - Next 30 Miles No Shoulder to cry on.

'I spy with my little intelligence gathering app...'

"This is your captain speaking. Thank you for flying with us, and for using your time on board to contemplate the cruel paradox of polluting the very planet that we love to travel and explore."

Truck Introspection Station: 'Am I happy? Does my life have meaning?'

Gas bar, Full service/Self-serving tightwads

"My wife has been walking five miles a day. I think she's somewhere in the middle of Pennsylvania now."

'I leave in three weeks.'

Flight nap

Crawling Marathon.

Signpost for petrol in the Desert

Not a happy camper.

"I told you if you fed the sea gulls they'd never leave us alone."

Man staring at a large confusing map

Motor Homes and Reading Material

'Call this turbulence? 25 years of marriage, THAT'S turbulence.'

Entering California, Keep it Real.

Motorist sees a sign at state border reading 'Welcome, Missouri Loves Company'.

How's my driving? 1-900-555-3121